A Facebook friend posted this pic and it led me back to the term "Crabs in a Barrel"... You see, in life there are some people that just can not be happy for someone else if things in their life is in turmoil. You know, the people who just can't celebrate when someone else is doing a good thing? Or those who don't want to see anyone else be celebrated for their good deeds, or even for just looking good? Well just say hello to those crabs in a barrel....
And it goes a lil something like this... You have a bunch of unhappy, stubborn, prickly crabs all stuck in one barrel. One day, a bold, open minded crab decides to change his situation. So he gathers up his strength and starts to climb up the barrel. It's a long journey. A hard journey. But he's got what it takes.
As crabs are wont to do, they grab and latch onto anything that moves or DEVIATES from the unhappy norm. So now you have one crab scrabbling to get out of the barrel and make a difference while another has latched on like a parasite and doesn't do ANYTHING to help out. Now maybe this crab is strong enough to support one slacker crab.
But then ANOTHER and then ANOTHER latches on. So enough, and no matter how strong and determined that crab is, the sheer weight of all these other lazy, negative crabs will bring down the first one. And now instead of having one happy crab roaming free out in the world, you still have a full barrel of unhappy crabs who think it's normal to be mediocre, unhappy, and ignorant.
Thus, the term: Crabs in a Barrel.... There are many people who have had unhappy lives and generally have dissatisfying personal relationships or even have a hard time making friends. It's a sad fact, but if you're trying to change yourself, then only change yourself. You can't help someone who doesn't want to be helped. It's like why is it that in an airplane that's going down and oxygen masks pop out, a mother is supposed to put it on herself FIRST and then her child. It seems cruel on first inspection, but if she didn't make sure SHE was conscious and capable, then she couldn't do the same for her child and then both of them end up unconscious or worse. Same goes with pick up, help yourself first and then lead by example. If they want help, then you help, but don't rub it in.
The other part of the coin is that as you become more successful, it breeds jealousy and envy. When your entire social circle is already full of negative thinking, unchanging, obstinate friends and they see you change, they're going to try to prevent it and bring you down like the Crabs in the Barrel Syndrome. Don't let that happen.
It's mean, but sometimes you have to let these kind of friends go. They aren't helping you or, worse, they're actually harming you with their negative pessimism and defeatist thoughts. You have to surround yourself with people that you want to help, who help you, and generally make each other better. Not with those who are satisfied with the status quo or people who are cynical. As I've said before, cynicism is what passes for insight in mediocre minds... So just let them crabs breed together...
Live, Laugh and most of all be FABulous!
